Warning: May Be Awkward For Some

For all the girls out there, you know that one thing that comes to visit every month? That annoying, uncomfortable, and just gross thing that we get every month?
Yeah, your period.

First off, let me point of how completely unfair it is that women get this every single month and men don't. Not only do we menstruate but we also give birth and have boobs. WTF creator of the human race; why are woman stuck with all the negatives?

Anyways, yes, I am in fact a female. And yes, every month for about a week I''m stuck with this annoying condition. And lucky for me, I get the WORST cramps ever.

So finally, after too many pain, tears and Advil, I decided to do a little research about why I get cramps and why mine are so painful when others have no side effects to their period at all.

What are menstrual cramps? What causes them? Why the heck do I get them?! How do I make the pain stop? And other questions you might have.
First off, the medical website described it as a disorder. How comforting does that sound? Basically, cramps are a pain or heaviness is your abdominal area.
Each month, the lining of your uterus builds up in preparation for a pregnancy. So if you don't get pregnant during that time, that lining in no longer needed. So it becomes swollen and dies. (Man, this is all so lovely, isn't it?)
When the old uterine lining begins to break down, molecular compounds called prostaglandins are released. These compounds cause the muscles of the uterus to contract and blah blah blah.
Eventually, some tissue is literally squeezed through the cervix and out of your body.

So the pain of menstrual cramps comes from the old dead tissue stuff being pushed through your cervix by the wall contracting.
If I think these are painful, just wait till I give birth. Baby's head are like the size of cantelopes! Ouch, my poor cervix. I'll need a lot of drugs if I ever push a little bundle of joy through my tiny cervix.


So are you still following? Have I bored you to tears yet? Or at least made you feel awkward enough that you completed just skipped those paragraphs?
Well, if you get agonizing cramps like I do (hopefully you don't!), I'm just trying to help you understand why and maybe give you some answers about how to fix our so called disorder.


Prostaglandins are evil, according to me. They are what make menstrual cramps painful (for the most part). Contractions occur in response to prostaglandins.

Lack of exercise contributes to menstrual cramps. When you exercise, you release prostaglandins.
And, obviously, if you have a narrow cervix, menstrual cramps are more painful for you.


If you have cramps, you should get enough sleep because not only is a side effect of being on your period fatigue, but because it's healthy for you!
And you should exercise. Not hardcore gym workouts though, just nice simple exercising like walking or yoga. (I bought a yoga dvd and it's Yoga with Geri Halliwell. She's annoying as hell, but yoga itself is so relaxing. Try it sometime!)
Also, you could take Midol (which is make for menstrual cramps) or even just an ibuprofen (yeahh generic brand! It seriously works just as good as Advil or Motrin).

Obviously, if you have like severe "oh my god, just rip out of cervix, this pain is unbearable" go see your doctor. My friend takes birth control to help her (which also helps with acne by the way) so maybe you could suggest that to your doctor if you want.




This is longer than I expected it to be. Especially since I'm taking about something so awkward.
So, let's make things less awkward for us, and more awkward for Joe Jonas:

Love her.